Archive for the 'randomnesseth' Category

09
Nov
11

anti-feminist humor

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to exclaim that the light-bulb has violated the socket, and the other to secretly wish that she was the socket.

——————————————————————————————————

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb:
12.
One to screw it in,
one to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination,
one to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination,
one to suggest the whole “screwing” bit to be too “rape-like”,
one to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic,
one to blame men for not changing the bulb,
one to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it,
one to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs,
one to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs,
one to advocate that lightbulb changers should have wage parity with electricians,
one to alert the media that women are now “out-lightbulbing” men,
one to just sit there taking pictures for her blog for photo-evidence that men are unnecessary.

——————————————————————————————————-

Q-How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A-None, it’s not the lightbulb that needs changing.

——————————————————————————————————-

How do you make a radical gender feminist disappear?
Expose her to Preparation H.

How do radical gender feminists define “self-fulfilling prophecy”?
As research findings.

How do you uphold a radical gender feminist’s freedom of speech?
By taking your [-brain-] out of her mouth.

——————————————————————————————————-

Q: How many feminist presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It’s going to be dark for the next four years, isn’t it?

Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be open when she brings it to you.

Q: How many men does it take to fix a woman’s watch?
A: Why does she need a watch? There’s a clock on the oven!

——————————————————————————————————-

Note: I don’t have anything personal with feminism, but I am certainly against extremists. I after reading several articles and blogs I could conclude that feminism is one of those extreme (not worth) idealism.

I agree to the fact that they stand for is something that needs to be done. A good cause. But I don’t really appreciate their methodology. To be honest 8 women out of 10 who claim to be a feminists are posers.  Remaining 2 are the actual ones who have been the victim of violence and sexual harassment which led them to become a feminist.

More over so-called/self-proclaimed/poser/i-am-different-than-the-others-hence-i-m-a-feminist are apparently ones who failed to have a guy in real life. So all they’ve got left to do is to cook and rest of the time spent over internet, going through blogs and keep on blathering about being feminist. My advice to such females is, get a life-I mean start looking for a guy with a big dick, that’ll suffice your frustration !

condolences !

 

29
Sep
11

stereotype feminists !!

I’ve been lately reading/over-viewing blogs by Indians. Mostly they’re teenage blathering and about their break-ups and such cliche stuff. Endless poems and songs containing the same stereotype you-broke-my-heart-i-am-so-sad themes. Now talking about Ladies especially.

There are certain bunch of ’em, who have read books little more than an average person would and have “deep” knowledge about philosophical aspects of “life”. Now there are certain traits that these women/girl (preferred to be called Lady).

1. They would feel very proud to be called feminists.

2. They might claim that they are bi-sexual (or some might even claim to be strictly lesbian). I bet they’ve never had sex in their whole life, nor a lesbian make-out either.

3. They desperately follow “L word” or a TV series that nobody would’ve ever heard of. Also some hollywood actress, preferably famous, who is a lesbian and their wardrobe would be very much influenced by any of the characters of the series FO SHO !

4. They stalk 1000s of facebook profiles and keep and eye on the “books” in the info section. And then would write such books’ and authors’ names in their own profile which are not found in those 1000.

5. Mostly they follow a certain author or a book’s philosophy (which you’ve not ever heard of) and preferably a female author.

6. They would listen to weirdest music and would talk random when discussed their music taste. And it would change so frequently, yet they’d claim themselves as a sensible music lover !!

7. Mostly they’d try to portray themselves as NERDS (as shown in The Big Bang Theory), which I believe they would be, and would claim that they dig guys like sheldon cooper (provided that he should be white by skin, coz probably the population of nerds in India is likely to be more than Croatia’s total population) And they would be flaunting about some mathematician from 16th century, whose theories got proven wrong years later already.

8. They are bound to have Tumblr and/or deviantArt (insert any cool social networking website that you have not heard of)  account in order to remain cool-er than the rest of the world. And they’d befriend with any random “guy” from the last corner of the world, but would never reply to someone from the same ethnicity.

9. Apparently, in real life, she’d not have much friends and failed to date a guy (or failed to be dated) Therefore she would prefer to be called an Individualist.

10. In order to extensive reading, she’d use English which even Brits stopped using after 16th century !

PS- This post is just for fun, I mean no offense to these females. Apparently I dig and respect true women ! Feminist who are brave enough to come out of shell instead of shedding tears. But if you’re a poser. I will slap you first and then let you blather about feminism.

22
Jul
11

Jennifer Lopez steals bollywood tune?

While surfing channels, I heard this J.Lo song “on the floor” featuring Pitbull. When I heard the tune, I sounded familiar. The tune kept on buzzing all day long and then I suddenly realized, that it’s the tune we’ve been hearing since childhood.

The links below will amuse you !!

the old bollywood song !

 

This is not where it ends, coz when I came to know that it was composed by our own Bappi da !! made me look further and found the original song !! there you go

 

11
Mar
11

Music of the mind

Like nothing you’ve ever heard out loud before, Music Of The Mind opens doors to a whole new world of compositional possibility.  But as BBC jazz award-winning saxophonist, flautist and composer Finn Peters proves, the tunes are probably already in your head…

Reminiscent of a Kubrick film, Music Of The Mind (MOTM), is a truly unique project: one that combines scientific experiment, modern music, performance theatre and education, to make music that is both revolutionary and hugely enjoyable.

Inspired by the pioneering experiments of Dr Mick Grierson at Goldsmith’s University (an experimental artist specialising in real-time interactive audiovisual research with focus on cognition and perception), alongside Peters’ own research, MOTM utilises pioneering Brain Computer Interface (BCI) technology and specially commissioned software (written by Matthew Yee-King) to allow musicians to literally think music into being. This is the first time ever that such technology has been used outside high-grade scientific institutions.

The project has received funding from the the Arts Council. Neurosky provided Brain Computer Interface equipment and technical support was given by The Innovative Computing Department at Goldsmiths University.

 

NOTE : The original article and more information can be found here.

27
Feb
11

bassist : according to urban dictionary

I was amazed by the definitions written there..here are few which I loved !!

=>Bassist
Musician who plays the bass guitar.
Primaraly part of the rhythm section however can be considered a lead instrument in some bands (e.i Motorhead, Mudvayne, Old Metallica, Red hot chilli peppers etc.)
Though a bassist may choose to play with 4 strings, he may play anywhere up to 12 strings. These are called extended range basses, or ERBS.
Bassists may also play the upright bass or double bass.
Generally speaking, a bassist is much more inclined towards funk and groove playing. The bass is more or less the instrument that makes the girls shake their booty.
Bassists are important for a band because they are able to hold the song together whilst a guitarist solo’s over the song. During solos the bassist and drummer may ‘Lock’, making it much easier for the guitarist to keep time, and makes the song much simpler.
Bassists may play in a variety of styles: Pick Style, Finger Style, Slapping, Tapping etc. Each adds its own element to songs.
Nowadays bassists use mainly picks, for a variety of reasons that may include: They prefer the timbre of pick playing or they arent fast enough with their fingers.
Many bassists are classically trained or inclined.

Some famous bassists include:
Les Claypool (Primus)
Flea (red hot chilli peppers)
Cliff Burton (metallica)
Lemmy (motorhead)
Victor Wooten (Bela fleck and the flecktones)
Jaco Pastorious (Weather Report)
Stu Hamm (steve vai)
Billy Sheehan (Mr Big)
Rob Trujillo (Suicidal Tendancies, Metallica)
Mark Hopp…

=>bassist

1.A person who has probably banged your girlfriend, because girls cannot seem to resist them, because deep sounds are arousing to women.

2.a female bassist is common and is usually underappreciated visually, and is often stereotyped as a lesbian.

1.Why do you think men have deep voices?

2.I’m a female bassist, and the other girls in my band get all the attention.

=>bassist
N. 1) A person who plays the bass guitar or the stand up bass (aka. double bass, contra bass, bass violin).
2) A person who used to play the guitar and decides that playing the bass is essentially the same as playing guitar. Many times these are simply ‘bass players’ and not bassist’s. Not to say that crossing over is wrong or that all who do predominantly suck, but that one must BE a bassist not just play the bass.
3) One who studies the art of music utalizing the bass as a medium. One who learns music on bass/f clef first.
4) Bassist’s are quiet, laid back, and quirky in nature. Many times the bassist is the most humble guy/chick in a band due to the role of the instrument. Bass is the anchor of music along with drums, although bass is often audibly more subliminal.
God is a bassist
Jesus plays drums
=>bassist
The member of the band with the largest genitalia.
Person #1: Dude, have you seen Billy’s junk? That thing is monstrous!
Person #2: No surprise there; he’s a bassist.
=>bassist
A bassist is a musician who plays either stand-up bass or the bass guitar. He/she provides the rhythmic and harmonic foundation to a song, and is found in most any type of music, including jazz, rock, heavy metal, salsa, classical, funk, and even hip-hop.

Due to simplistic and unimaginative musicians taking over the rock mainstream, the bassist is often looked at as the guy in the background thumping along on the E-string, playing root notes and doubling the rhythm guitar. Anyone who thinks this cannot rightly be blamed; after all, there are so many “I play 4 notes per song and contribute nothing” bassists out there such as Paul Thomas, Brent Wilson, Pete Wentz, and David Desrosiers (to name a few) that the instrument hardly gets any recognition among casual music fans. The aforementioned, however, are actually not bassists but something called “failed guitarists” who had too much trouble with bar chords but decided they wanted to be in a band anyway, and switched to bass. Such “musicians” have no business being in the same category as Les Claypool, Victor Wooten, Flea, and even nu-metalers like Fieldy and Ryan Martinie who gave something to music.

What goes unrealized is how the right bassline, played by a true bassist and not just a failed guitarist, can make an otherwise average song extraordinary.

Person 1: Hey, I can’t even hear the bassist in this song.

Person 2: Yeah, because he’s just playing the root notes and the producer tuned him out because his timing sucks anyway.

-OR-

Person 1: Dude, the bass in this Primus track is sick!

Person 2: Yeah, Claypool is a truly awesome bassist.

—————————————————————————-
this was from here
11
Feb
11

Rock n’ roll children

My attempt at writing out and out rebellious rock n’ roll song. Suggestions and critiques are welcomed !

[V1]
We are children of rock n’ roll
we deny the god damn chase
you may have sold your soul
but we are the one who win the race

[Chorus]
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you imagine
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you’ve seen
Do you understand what I mean
it’s our f*cking religion

[V2]
We don’t f*ckin’ follow the crowd
We stand against authority
You may think you own the crown
but we are the one to establish the prophecy

[Chorus]
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you imagine
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you’ve seen
Do you understand what I mean
it’s our f*cking religion

[Chorus]
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you imagine
Do you understand what I mean
It’s beyond what you’ve seen
Do you understand what I mean
it’s our f*cking religion

© Prayag Thakkar, 2011

20
Jan
11

Euphoria gig?

Okay,  so I went to this “free” gig last night and the headlining (also the only) band was “Euphoria“. Indian Rock/sufi/indie pop/shit rock/(put any random insulting word along with rock) band had come down to perform in some dentistry school, which I had never heard of until one of my friend got in there (that’s last year). It was almost 25 km away, none of us had money for the fuel. Which resulted into me scratching my card despite knowing that I’m never gonna get that money back ! 😦

We were surprised to see that the whole road was filled with parked cars on both the sides. I wonder people are really crazy that they come this far in cold to such stupid acts. Nevermind. Now, at the gate, there were two bouncers, too. :O (later, in the gig, I even saw a security guy with gun residing in the wallet, whatever it’s called, just like one they show in those fancy CID shows, one underneath armpit) . As we entered there was helluva crowd shouting and cheering and I was like wtf. That guy was literally shouting and singing off note.

The stage set up and lighting was really amazing. Sound sucked, so did the band. Bass guitar was not at all audible (I doubt whether he was playing or not). There was no melody in the vocals. More over they played stupid covers of hindi songs. A band like Euphoria (apparently a mainstream band), despite having 4 studio albums and 5th one to release, has to play covers of “apni toh paath shaala”, “emotional atyachar” etc. what could be more failure than this !! *sings “mm..mm it makes me wonder” in Robert Plant accent*

I have to admit one thing that Dental college have so many hot chicks, which you can’t hit upon !!

 

Few clarifications :

I wrote this because..

1. Band review was so small that I had to write crap initially

2. To educate those n00bs that rock is something different than what you saw last night

3. Someday Euphoria member (or the whole band) reads this and face the reality

4. I was bored

 

PS-I am so excited about Led Zepplica gig this weekend at IIMA.

Now playing : Gallows Pole – Led Zeppelin




yeah, that’s me

pearls of wisdom

"Apparently people don't like the truth, but I do like it; I like it because it upsets a lot of people. If you show them enough times that their arguments are bullshit, then maybe just once, one of them will say, 'Oh! Wait a minute - I was wrong.' I live for that happening. Rare, I assure you."

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